In our current world, authenticity feels rare. Being your most authentic self can be complex, especially with all the influences of the internet. Learning to be your most genuine self is vital when building meaningful relationships with others. In order to be your most authentic self, your words and actions need to be in alignment with your core values.
Instead of putting on a mask and portraying who you think you should be rather than who you know you really are, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. Being self-aware and accepting who you are can take you so much further in life than wearing a mask. Here are ten ways to help you take off your mask and be your most genuine self.
1. Examine Your Belief System
A lot of people grow up being taught what their beliefs and values should be by their family members. It can be good to examine your current beliefs and determine whether they are in alignment with who you really are or if they’re beliefs that you were forced to adopt early on in life.
If you behave in ways that feel out of alignment with your core values, it could be from periods in early life where you had to stop being your genuine self and put on a mask in order to please others.
2. Identify Discrepancies
Try to become more self-aware so you can identify discrepancies between the way you act and what you believe. When you become more aware of the things you say and do, you can think back on why you behave this way and whether you really believe what you say or if it was something taught to you that you never unlearned. If you figure out what you do that is out of alignment with your values, you can start to work on them and improve yourself.
3. Define Your Core values
Living your best life in the most authentic way you can, starts with knowing your values. Sometimes we are so disconnected from ourselves we don’t have any idea of what our true values are. To do this, you can make a list of what you value most some examples are:
Kindness
Loyalty
Optimism
Knowledge
Integrity
Once you have a list of 5 to 10 things you value most, try to find ways to incorporate them into your life.
4. Face Your Fears
Fear is one of the biggest reasons people don’t live authentically. Fear of rejection, judgment, and embarrassment are all reasons people tend not to be their most genuine selves. When exploring your values and trying to live more in alignment with them, it can be scary and off-putting, but it’s important to face those fears and push past them.
5. Change Habits That No Longer Serve You
When you become more self-aware, and you observe yourself doing or saying something that doesn’t represent who you truly are, work on changing or letting go of these habits. It can help to write out the negative things and then throw them away. Almost like a ritual, but it can be uplifting and help on your path to becoming your genuine self.
6. Be Assertive
It can be hard to stand up for yourself, but it’s important you don’t let people force you into doing something that isn’t in alignment with your core values. We often get scared of confrontation, so we just let things happen instead of standing up for what we believe. If you find you’re constantly in situations where you feel like someone is forcing you to do something that doesn’t represent who you are, be assertive and say no.
7. Identify Internal Motivators and External Influences
When you start to know what your true values are, you can start to identify internal motivators and external influences. Internal motivators are things that drive you from deep within yourself.
These are things that keep pushing you to be the best version of yourself. External influences are things that drive you to make decisions that aren’t aligned with your core beliefs. These are things like money, status, or expectations from the people around you.
Once you identify these motivators and influences, you can start to ask yourself questions like:
Is this truly what I want?
Am I being pressured to do this?
Am I willing to do whatever it takes to accomplish this?
Will this bring me closer to my true self?
Asking yourself questions like these can provide clarity into your true motives and give you peace of mind in the decisions you make.
8. Listen to Your Intuition
One of the best things you can do for yourself is to listen to your gut. Following your intuition is essential in discovering who you really are. Try to keep an ear open for your inner guidance. Listen if it tells you you’re doing things unauthentically.
9. Find A Group of Supportive People
Having a close circle of supportive people around you can make all the difference when trying to be your most genuine self. If you have people around you that try to push you to be a better person and support the changes you make in your life, it can take you further to your goal.
Having people around that try to pressure you into things you’re not comfortable with or make you feel you need to act a certain way isn’t good for bettering yourself. Try to keep people around that bring out the best in you.
10. Be Compassionate and Loving Towards Yourself
Becoming your most genuine self won’t happen overnight. You have to have patience with yourself. Understand that things won’t go perfectly, and everyone makes mistakes. Treat yourself with love and kindness, so you are encouraged to push past the bad days and build yourself into a better person.
Final Thoughts
Becoming your most genuine self is a long process full of struggle and error. Understand your true core values and beliefs and work towards living in harmony with them. Take steps every day to live more authentically and be the person you truly are instead of who you think you’re supposed to be.
